The Perfect Killer (Italy, 1977) 90 min color DIR: “Marlon Sirko” (aka- Mario Siciliano). SCR: Santiago Moncada, Marta Siciliano. MUSIC: Stelvio Cipriani. DOP: Alejandro Ulloa. CAST: Lee Van Cleef, “Tita Barker” (aka- Carmen Cervera), John Ireland, “Robert Widmark” (aka- Alberto Dell-Acqua), Fernando Sancho, Diana Polakov.
The Perfect Killer was just the kind of obscure movie in a dusty big box that seemed at home in Ronnie’s Variety. (See my article for context.) Naturally, once I eyed it amidst those wooden shelves while looking for that night’s video fix, I snapped it up because it starred my main man Lee Van Cleef.
I make all concessions in my admiration for Lee Van Cleef, even if I often had to hide my embarrassment in seeing this great actor get wasted in really crummy Italian westerns or, after that cycle ran out, low-buck action melodramas. After viewing this thing that fateful Thursday evening, I considered this the worst picture he ever made. What the devil was this mess? An amateurish, cardboard thriller with Lee Van Cleef doing softcore sex scenes? Time however has proven me wrong. The nadir of his leading roles is the insipid Spanish “comedy” western, Bad Man’s River.
However, years later, I discovered a VHS copy of this at a flea market, and naturally felt compelled to view it again. (In the early 2000s, I would grab any obscure VHS pre-record I could find, before they all disappeared.) A second glance reveals the film not to be that bad, though it’s certainly the worst of the too-few Eurocrime films the actor did make.
Van Cleef is Harry Chapman, a crook who is double-crossed by his partner and his girlfriend in a racetrack heist. The mob gets him sprung from jail on the condition that he becomes a hit man for the organization. We are treated to a tiresome montage of people getting shot – a comment on how mechanical being a hired killer really is? (One of the film’s several home video titles for is Satanic Mechanic!) But, once Chapman realizes he is set up to kill an old friend, he quits the organization. The mob of course doesn’t let anyone off the hook that easily, so Chapman is pursued by a crazed psycho-sexual gunman, who is only too pleased to take the assignment because Chapman humiliated him. In the meantime, Chapman gets romantically involved with a cute model named Liv (Diana Polakov) – cue aforementioned sex scene.
Alas, soon follows an awful, completely unnecessary scene where this psycho rapes and kills her. (Whatever can be said, “Robert Widmark” at least makes this character appropriately hissable.) This moment, plus a scene with transvestites, surely won’t play well in these more politically correct times, but it may be argued that by this time in the Italian crime movie cycle, taste was eschewed as much as originality. As is typical for the genre, double-cross after double-cross occurs, however tacked-on or preposterous. Somehow all of these contrivances circle back to Chapman facing his ex-lover (“Tita Barker”) and ex-partner.
However, I guess this is a mildly enjoyable piece of yesteryear, with its colourful “mod” milieu (the nightclub sequences feel like they’re out of a “giallo” film) and the expected “cop show funk” soundtrack. Van Cleef is okay– he slightly overacts, wisely kidding the second-rate material. In the scene where he confronts his employer, there is a moment where his distinguishable voice is obviously dubbed by another actor. (Did he bail before the final mix was completed? Perhaps he sighed, knowing he’d reached the end of his tether as a leading man in Italy.) John Ireland adds some much-needed dignity to the cardboard proceedings as Chapman’s old pal who runs a nightclub (and an ID forgery on the side).
To be fair, it may be hard to evaluate Mario Siciliano’s direction, as this tape’s full-screen transfer crops any good framing that may have existed in its original widescreen format. The Perfect Killer still can only be seen on this continent in this fashion- so until Blue Underground or Severin step up to the plate, I suppose it’s better than nothing.
